You cannot break free from your current state of being, which is – in turn – reaffirming the current state of your life, until you are able to fully realize how attached you truly are. The concept of being attached goes much deeper than attachments to material items and/or forms of entertainment. And although we would overall be much more aware if we all put down our phones and kept the television off, doing so would only scratch the surface as it would leave us to our thoughts.

But when we are left with our thoughts, we are not left with thoughts that accurately reflect who we truly are and what we truly believe. The thoughts that we are left with do not originate from our authentic self.

Instead, we are left with unconscious thoughts; thoughts that we have learned from how we were made to feel from our caregivers throughout our upbringing alongside a collective of social experiences (experiences from our childhood, adolescence, and even adulthood) that quickly told us what is normal, what is not, what is expected, what should be avoided, what we are capable of, and what we are deserving of.

Think about it. What is the actual reason why we all have different opinions and beliefs regarding social constructs and our own self-worth? Babies are not born with pride toward a particular political group. Babies are not born with the belief that toxic relationships are the norm and the extent of the type of love they deserve. Although a baby is born into a specific country, that baby is not born with pride for that country nor holds negative beliefs about the people who live in other countries.

And this is not because babies are too young, naïve, or ignorant. It is because they are pure from external influences.

The aforementioned examples are just the beginning of how profoundly our individualized environment and experiences form “our identity”, thus shaping our reality.

Your “identity” – or what you believe to be your identity – is not actually your own. It is a product of the environment you were born into alongside a collective of social experiences you have endured.

This is difficult for some people to digest since many of us have such a strong conviction of our “identity”. We believe it is what makes us…us.

However, if you were born into drastically different circumstances (different family, country, culture, etc.), your “identity” would be drastically different from the one you hold on so tightly to today.

Upon first glance, this concept might seem a bit obvious for some. But it is not obvious to most. The proof of that lies in the current state of human behavior as many of us allow “our identity” to separate ourselves in a way that promotes hatred; hatred toward ourselves and others.

I assume that most of us do not want to live a life filled with hatred, resentment, insecurity, judgment, anxiety, and competition. But many of us do. And it is this “identity” that keeps us in that box. It is this “identity” that is causing us the hardship that we do not want.

But it is not even our own nor does it represent who we are. It represents what we were taught by others. It represents how we were made to feel at one point or another in our life. And we absorbed that information; we believed it. And now many of us are so convinced by it that we will fight for it and/or cry about it. We are so convinced by it that we allow it to determine the path of our life; so much so that a lot of us feel “stuck”.

Additionally, since deviating from these learned expectations and norms have typically offered us negative feedback from our social environment, we have unconsciously conditioned ourselves throughout our lifetime to adhere to these invisible social rules that have a profound influence over us for this very reason.

In the progress of doing so, however, we suppress integral parts of our self in order to fit in with our surroundings. If we do not, we know that many aspects of the social life that we have created for ourselves will crumble. We will lose some relationships, we will not be accepted as easily and frequently, we will be forced to endure awkward and uncomfortable situations, and we might begin to feel lonely.

Some people pride themselves on being “unapologetically authentic” when they are nothing but. These people express themselves in a way that is energetically strong. They outwardly appear very confident. They go as far as to publicly admit that they do not care about what other people think. They are quick to speak. They are quick to give their opinions. They are either slow or unwilling to listen to the opinions of others.

It’s paradoxical in the sense that these are the people that tend to complain that (although they proclaim that they “don’t care”) they are either not accepted by others or that others are not in perfect alignment with their “identity”. As a result, they have a tendency to perceive others as being closed-minded, judgmental, or just plain wrong. But on the same token, these are the very same people who also have a tendency to only see the world from their point of view as it relates to their “identity”. But the basis of their conviction lies in their attachment to an “identity” that social constructs ultimately created.

They fail to accept the fact that we are all individuals; individuals with differing upbringings, varied life experiences and, therefore, different opinions and worldviews. And they are no exception to that.

They are not above it, nor below it.

The key is to find a harmonious balance between separation and unity. But we usually see two problems with this. First, people tend to overly identify with one over the other. They either overly identity with a feeling of separation, or they overly identity with a false sense of unity. Second, people tend to be mistaken about what it means to be separated and what it means to be unified.

When we overly identify with an “identity” that originates from social constructs, we tend to only unite ourselves with others that either identify with it as well or with those who are in support of it.

However, when we do this, we are ultimately detaching ourselves from the very thing that connects all of us together; the human experience. This is when we start to feel that we (or our “ways”) are better than others. This is when we start to feel like certain social groups are better than other social groups.

Furthermore, when we overly identify with an “identity” that originates from social constructs, we ultimately fail to discover and then honor our authentic self (the very thing that “separates” us from others).

Instead, we are living our lives through the lens of external factors. In doing so, we fail to separate ourselves out of fear of socially unpleasant reactions. We find comfort in our social “identity”. It makes us feel like we have a place in this world. It makes us feel unique when it – in actuality – does the opposite. And, in the meantime, we hide certain parts of ourselves. Especially if they are not “cool” in mainstream society. Especially if we do not believe we are capable or deserving of it.

So what do we do?

Our thoughts form our beliefs. Our thoughts create the emotions we feel. But our thoughts are also unconscious and automatic. And even though we would like to think we are, we are not the origin of our thoughts. But we can be. However it cannot be done without humility, introspection, and self-honesty.

Unfortunately, many of us view our thoughts – thus beliefs – as factual. They are “reality”. And many of us do not like it when anyone or anything attempts to challenge these beliefs; especially if they are told that their beliefs are not even their own. This conviction is stubborn. This conviction is self-righteous. This conviction is ugly.

And the kicker is that the thoughts and beliefs that most people hold on so tightly to are not even serving them well. These attachments are not even making them happy. They are, in fact, adding negativity to your energy field.

But people are willing to fight for them. They are willing to spread hatred over them. They are also willing to feel incapable and undeserving because of them. They allow themselves to remain “stuck” in a bad situation because of them.

Because many of us are ATTACHED to them.

But true freedom from our current state of being – the current state of your life – occurs when we begin to challenge ourselves; when we question everything.

We can do this by tracing our thoughts and beliefs back to their origins. This gives us a clearer understanding of where they came from. Because they certainly did not start with you.

This is not an easy thing to do because your ego will always challenge it. But it is possible. And once you are able to accomplish this, once you are able to determine the origin of all your thoughts and beliefs, you have the power to decide whether or not you want to agree to it; whether or not you want to continue that legacy for yourself.

Because, up until now, you have been in so much agreement with your programmed “identity” that you have ultimately allowed it to shape not only who you are, but you have also allowed it to determine your reality. And you’re also allowing it to keep you “stuck” in the same patterns that are preventing you from manifesting a new reality. When we free ourselves from these attachments, we begin to raise our vibrational frequency. When we raise our vibrational frequency, we attract good into our lives.

Unfortunately, children have limited control over their environment – the state of their life – because they are still dependent upon their caregivers. This is sadly why we see, or hear of, so many children in toxic environments; they currently do not have a choice.

But adults have that opportunity to change what was given to them. Some adults take advantage of this opportunity, and many do not. And it is a shame, because they deserve better.

Everyone deserves better.

And after we strip ourselves of anything and everything that did not originate from us, what is left?

Well that is up to us to decide now, isn’t it.

There is just so much to say. I will continue later. Thank you for reading.